I'm not going to lie to you: Hall and Oates don't rock.
But sometimes their lyrics are appropriate. For instance, when blogging about a coworker who's hired a private eye, you might want to start off by quoting a Hall and Oates lyric as the title. I know I just did.
So I work with a woman who has hired a private eye. Why? Because she's got more drama in her life than the entire rest of the office combined. The most dramatic thing that ever happened in my life (my sister's family had an adoption fall through) wouldn't even make this lady's weekly Top Ten list. Here are some of her typical events:
- After much consideration, I can't type the things she does. They are hilarious and numerous, but they are so outlandish that there is no way a family member of hers would not recognize her from the description of the crazy things that have happened in her life.
It pains me, because I really want to tell you all the wacky stories I've heard here at work over the past two years. But my question is: who hires a private eye? Seriously. My brother-in-law's friend is a private eye. If you suspect your spouse is cheating, just take the afternoon off work and trail him. It will be cheaper than hiring someone. And it's a lot less white trash.
Speaking of white trash, I think my family is. Not me, the misses, and the kids. I mean my parents and their kids. My mother's family would probably agree that she married into a hillbilly clan, and now my younger brother's wife's family thinks the same thing. When some of my family members went out to decorate my brother's car before he left the wedding reception, my sister-in-law's brother-in-law told us that they thought it was "disrespectful." Man, if he thought that was disrespectful, what would he have said had he been there at one o'clock that night when I called my brother's cell phone just because "I felt like a chat"? (My brother didn't answer.)