One day in junior high, shortly after Halloween, I was bored in English class with a package of Smarties. Intent on making their consumption as distracting as possible, I decided to crush them and eat them by licking my finger and sticking it in the pile of dust, like Fun Dip. My friend noticed that white Smarties looked like cocaine when crushed into a powder (at least, what he imagined cocaine to look like; we weren't especially gangsta in our junior high). When class wound down, I left a few lines on a desk for the next class to get a laugh. And that was how I got suspended for three days.
This story doesn't come up all that often these days, but it's coming up now because I just became aware of this news story: kids in Alabama are totally ripping off my idea. Although I was smart enough to not actually snort the crap. But idiots or not, they owe me royalties.