I don't even remember how I ended up on Wikipedia's page for ventriloquism, but I do remember my disbelief when I read, "Originally, ventriloquism was a religious practice." What? How did these old-timey acolytes not look at them and think, "I can see his lips moving"? I mean, unless they had Señor Wences doing it.
But every other ventriloquist is crap. I have a hard time believing that mumbling your way through words containing the letter B is the path to religious conversion.
As with so many other things that aren't that important, in the Middle Ages they found a way to kill people over ventriloquism. They thought it was a sign of witchcraft. Now we're enlightened enough to know it's nothing more than the sign of a not-so-hot birthday party. All the bounce houses were booked, so Weekend Dad got you a ventriloquist, Billy. Try to live this down at school next week, I dare ya.