Thursday, January 28, 2016

More Church Cartoons, Now With MSG!

First up, a sister in our branch was giving a talk on gratitude, and immediately after telling a story about her car breaking the day she expressed gratitude for it, she told us she was grateful she had working legs.

Next, a different sister in our branch told us a story about when she was a missionary and they came across a drunk man lying in the gutter.

Then we had a guy whose accent made it sound like he was talking about Joseph Smith's pet reptile.

Our youngest son is obstinate and lazy. I think if the kid doesn't know how to or can't be bothered to put the sacrament water in his own mouth, he's too young to participate in the sacrament. Our son doesn't want to drink from the cup himself, but doesn't want to be left out. I sent my wife this note, which she then responded to, which I then responded to.

Every branch or ward has someone who has no concept of time. This was the note I sent to my wife one testimony meeting when the first speaker had been going for at least 15 minutes.

A few months ago, we had a returned missionary from another branch come speak to us. I'm sure the guy is a great guy and his mom loves him and all that, but he bothered me. A lot. His talk seemed way too self-congratulatory. His topic was scattered and needlessly deep. Many of his sentences began with, "And if you think about it," implying that none of us had had these great insights because we were all too stupid to put in the thought that he had put in. I sent my wife this note.

The next week, we arrived at district conference to find this same speaker on the program.

Evidently, God is a southpaw.

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