Wednesday, March 06, 2013

Why I Want My Kids to Grow Up

There are some phrases that involve swear words that just can't be adequately replaced by their non-swearing equivalents. (I guess that means they aren't really "equivalents," then, huh? Well, then, their non-swearing approximations.) For instance, the phrase "crap just got real" is a poor, poor substitute for the original phrase "shit just got real." (Also, "horseshit" is superior to "baloney.")

Another is the phrase "half-assed." It just so succinctly summarizes exactly what's going on.

I am very aware of this because I've got an eight-year-old son who half-asses everything. There are so many times in a day that I want to tell him, "And don't half-ass it this time." But I can't, because he's eight.

Last week, while he was busily engaged in half-assing something, I said to him, "I can't wait until you grow up, because there's a perfect phrase to describe what you're doing, but it's PG-13."

1 comment:

The sort-of Republican said...

Excellent use of the mouth filter, Dad.