Tuesday, May 23, 2017

Maybe Drugs Are the Answer

Some of you maybe have picked up on the fact that I've been having an especially-difficult time these past 10 months or so. It has led to my paused-but-not-scrapped plan to cut all ties with pre-existing friends and family. How this summer turns out will be the deciding factor, I think.

Now, I never had any desire to try any drugs in my life, but that all changed when I saw Limitless. If I had access to Bradley Cooper's drug, I don't know what I'd do. (If I didn't have kids, I would take it with probability P > 1.) And with the success I'd have with it, the motivation for the friend-clearing plan would go away, so really my friends should be encouraging my drug use.

Two months ago, though, a second type of drug use became very appealing to me. Based on the strength of the recommendation in the lyrics to "Can't Feel My Face" by The Weeknd, I found myself wondering, "How would a guy like me even begin using heroin?" The good news is: I have no idea. I guess I'd find a marijuana dealer and work my way up? Sherlock seems like a totally respectable bloke and he's figured it out somehow, so it can't be impossible.

1 comment:

The sort-of Republican said...

This plan is new information to me. That could be because I'm in one of the groups with whom the plan calls for you to cut ties...

Anyway, I think the more salient question is: "How does a guy like me STOP using heroine?" Failing to answer this question would be like taking off in a plane without any assurance that you'll be able to land.